Writer's Block or Soap Box?

What a long month! Well work has been of intense of late and I've been experiencing quite a bit of writer's block. I've also been travelling. I've been hitching rides with the brother-in-law (BIL) to go see my sister and my parents every time he travels. Right now he has a job that keeps him away a lot so when he goes home, I go home. Well my other home. I think no matter how old you are home will always be at your parents house, wherever they are. Crazy but true, at least for this Mexican. Still at work right now but hoping that water would move faster than honey in December. Science, some days you love it, other days you want to be Marco Rubio and deny it all.

I've been following the politics a little. Just a little. I'm a pretty liberal person, in case the internets hasn't noticed. Actually if you live in TX I don't know if you can ever call yourself a liberal. That being said today I saw an odd article on the NY Times regarding the death penalty. I am not a staunch supporter of the death penalty but I am also not a serious opponent. The NY Times was - I guess - trying to condemn the death penalty in the article, calling Texas the most efficient state at administering the Death Penalty. It was surprising and a little sad but I think many Texans rarely think about it because it isn't publicized as much as you would think. It's pretty low-key, they use pentobarbital (I've used this myself on animals), and the only people present are usually family of the sentenced and the victim, along with necessary staff. Besides the lack of publicity in our state, the article goes on to say that more than 50% of the population supports the penalty.  When the death penalty is handed down, that is a solace (perhaps) for the victims families. There is that desire in some people to see the person who took from them a loved one, be put to death. I hope to never be in that position but I wonder if I would be so ready to forgive or to be OK with a life sentence only. I don't know that I wouldn't want them dead too. I think for that reason I do not oppose, but I do condemn the death penalty for it's failings. I think my biggest issue is the fact that so many people are condemned being innocent and that you can release someone from prison for a crime they didn't commit but you can't bring  someone back from the dead. Such a serious topic.  Sorry. Off my soap box.

Umm. So. I changed my profile pic! OK I'll be back tomorrow with something better.  I hope.

Nice Levels Dangerously Low

Today's post was going to be a very angry rant. I wrote it out and had juicy details, all that good stuff but once I had written it out my anger started to fade. Sort of. Suffice to say that some people suck the nice right out of you, I work with someone like that. Managed to suck a weeks worth of nice out of me. Anyway, although his face is still distasteful I no longer feel the need to punch it in - for now. Really reminds me of that crazy roommate I had, she never did anything wrong but you did.  This co-worker the same, only with male genitalia.

On a lighter note, my foot feels almost normal now.  Although quick question, is your heel supposed to pop when you walk barefoot?

Climbing Over the Block

Many things in this world give me joy, many things annoy me, I think we're pretty balanced between those two.  

Things that give me joy?

1. Rain!  I love the smell that bacteria produce when it rains. Yes, turns out that the lovely smell we associate with wet earth is from a bacterium - Actinomycetes. The difference between watering and rain causing the smell is that when we water by hand the water doesn't hit the ground with the same force as that of rain. The rain hits the ground so hard it causes the spores of this bacterium to rise in the air and we breathe it in thinking, "Oh isn't that a lovely smell." Still love rain.
2. Marshmallow's shenanigans. Recently we visited my parents and she got her head stuck in the fence but didn't cry out, no we found her that way. Who knows how long she had been like that. It was a little sad to see her head stuck but also funny. I don't think she enjoys being laughed at :)
3. The nephew. Always a load of fun. He is turning 4 years old and the child looks like a 6 year old! Still talks like a 4yo and hugs like one too. I will miss his toddler years I think, he is such a cuddler :)
4. Churros. Just yum.
5. Listening to music, it's just relaxing. All kinds of music, with the exception to the likes of Bieber and the likes. There are others but probably not as famous or I just don't know their names/groups.
6. The weather of late.  Sort of. We went from ~33C weather to 1C this weekend. I like the changes in the temperature when they aren't too extreme but the transition from winter to summer in TX is slightly different. We have like 1 month of this extremely perfect weather and then BOOM! 40C+ weather!
7. My improved (still improving) gardening skills! Yes I have successfully cared for 12 plants as of last year! WOOT! I plan on adding more plants to that this year and perhaps some veggies. Very ambitious.

What annoys me?

• Prefixing a dish with the word Mexican. Please stop doing that. Just because you add the word, does not mean it is a Mexican dish.  At least add "-like" or "Inspired" because that just irks me. I don't make enchiladas and call them cannoli. If you add chile of any type then it's an enchilada, if you don't then it is not an enchilada. Please stop. I'm sure other cultures would like that too.
• People who don't pull their weight at work. No names but ugh.
• The wind on the South Plains. Not cool.

Seems that I have more things I like than dislike. I would say that's progress from the past few years. I have also accomplished a few things from my new goals for the year! I have purged most of my clothing! My closet looks a little sad right now but that's OK because we are moving on. I joined the gym and have been only once because of my foot, it is still bothering me a little. Actually the day I went I damaged it further and it sent me right back to limping around. I had stopped having pain and figured I could jump around a bit but turns out I was wrong. I have success fully cooked 1 vegetarian meal per month, 2 in April!  Share some of them soon :)

I think that's enough for now, seems the block is over!

Limping Around

I am dry as the Mojave desert, I am totally blocked.  I obviously haven't written much of late but I just don't know what to write about.  Life has been a bit of a cliffhanger of late. There are so many things that race through my head and yet none of it seems suitable for the printed word. I feel like I've been in a perpetually bad mood for weeks now but it's only been a few days but even that is too long. It is like I'm waiting for the second shoe to drop but I don't know when the first one dropped or who dropped the shoe. Something big this way comes and it is freaking me out. Maybe I am imagining things but I still can't shake the feeling.  I really want to shake it off because I don't want this feeling to become a self-fulfilling prophecy kind of thing.

Perhaps it is the fact that Spring is here and the world is starting to wake up but it just doesn't feel right. Perhaps I am waking up too? The question being from what and to what but no answers forthcoming.  I think I am in a sort of limbo because my world is changing and things that I never considered have come into my periphery. We think of the world or at least our personal little world to be inviolate, not allowing the reality of others to color the things we do or think. However, recently I realized that my income, my health, and world in general are not inviolate. Work is actually good but truthfully in my line of work it is always on shaky ground. I could easily find a new job within my current department but I don't know that I would want to. I also hurt my foot while in San Francisco and my heel hurts sooo much! It is plantar fasciitis - according to me- but I'll verify with the doctor in a week or so. I have an appointment, my doctor is going to be mad with me because I gained soooooooooooo much weight. This is a follow-up and I was supposed to lose weight - I didn't. The world scenario is someone close to me had a health scare and nothing can make you open your eyes like a health scare! Yeah it is time to re-evaluate my life goals and make sure that I am where I want to be and if I have to vacate this place I want to be, where else would I like to be?

Things like my masters and starting a family have been on the backburner because I just didn't feel the necessity to change anything. I have been extremely comfortable but comfort seems to be a lying bastard! Anyway, it has just been weird. Right now I feel overwhelmed by all of this but I know that at the worst I am at my best. I guess it's just the fight response ingrained in me. Other than this I am currently obsessed with the Divergent trilogy. Who knew that one day I would return to reading fiction? YA fiction at that!

Many Moons

Hello everyone!  Sorry for the absence but lots of big things have happened since the last time we met! I think I'm changing my name to Many Moons. Lunar cycles have come and gone in my life for the past 35 years! I have beat my personal best for days without dying and I hope to continue doing so :)

I have been so busy these past few months, cliche I know but I have been BUSY. I went to San Francisco for a conference while I was sick. The day before my poster was to be presented I almost lost my voice but Sucrets saved the day. I got to see some friends I hadn't seen in a very long time and that was fun.  The city is quite pretty and diverse but a little (I mean a lot) dirty. Their homeless population is astounding and saddening. I have to say that city surprised me. The income disparity there is incredible. I am still amazed that you can go a few blocks and be in the Tenderloin but you just left a Hermes store. Yes the architecture is beautiful, the weather was awesome, the food great, and tons to do but not a very livable city. I know that you have a higher wage there but would it be worth it? Either way I most definitely enjoyed myself in San Francisco and would not discourage anyone from visiting.  The conference was a great success as well :) I'll post pictures soon but just haven't made the time to get the pics off my camera.

Then when I returned, I recovered from my cold and went from 34 to 35 yo. A big transition in my opinion. Its caused a bit of an existential crisis, I realized that if I had a kid this year that child would be in its teens when I am 50. All of a sudden I'm not so sure about kids anymore. I mean I love kids and I suppose I always assumed I would have them but it just hasn't happened for me. Lets just say I'm with Charlotte, I definitely thought my life would be waaaaaaaaaaay different by the time I was 35. As it seems I'm having a midlife crisis, am I allowed a flashy sports car? Or is the female equivalent a face-lift? Or boob-lift?

I prefer the car.

Otherwise, work is great and life is pretty good :)

Hope everyone is doing well and enjoying their lives!

Grandma 2.0

It is so cold!  Of late all I have wanted is to go home, curl up under some blankets, and wait for summer to arrive, while drinking hot chocolate.  I know it doesn't compare to Canada or Russia but holy scheiße!  I read "The Book Thief" recently and I learned quite a few curse words in German.  Excellent book despite the cursing.  Back to my issues.  It is cold here!

First time she had puppies.

I also have some news.  My dog, who is almost 11 years old, is preggers.  Yes.  You see, when she moved here I hadn't had her fixed, then she had puppies about 6 or 5 years ago and following that she developed Auto-Immune Hemolytic Anemia.  Due to the latter I decided against having her spayed because it might bring the AIHA back but I figured if I kept her in the house and didn't leave her within easy reach of non-neutered male dogs, we would be OK.  Turns out that while visiting my parents for Thanksgiving a non-neutered male dog got into my parents yard and impregnated my 10 year old dog.  We were there for a whole week so it could have happened at any point in time.  She had started getting fatter but last week she just blew up, I was mentally preparing myself to take her into the vet and hear the inevitable line, "It's time to consider euthanasia."  However, I decided on one last trip to the parents to say goodbye and then upon my return take her in because I thought it was the end.  Turns out it's just another beginning.  The minute my Mom saw her, she said, "Mija, this dog is fat."  That was translated from Spanish.

Mija = Sweetie

fat = preggers

It just never crossed my mind that she might be pregnant!  Dying?  Yes.  Pregnant?  NEVER! With all of the health issues she's had, I thought I was going to have to wrap my mind around her passing away, not giving birth!  To say I am stunned is quite the understatement.  I just don't know what she was thinking, getting pregnant at her age. The puppies haven't arrived but they should be here this weekend or next.  Well, that being said, anyone want a puppy?  Or two?